Asking price not truly asking price

Needed a place to vent.

My husband and I are first time home buyers. We are incredibly fortunate to be in a position to put down a sizeable down payment on a home. We live in a HCOL area with a very hot market.

We’ve looked at several houses with our realtor already where the asking prices were at or below our budget. Several of them, we looked at the house and our realtor goes “don’t look at the asking price” because it would go for far more than what was asked.

One home we liked, the seller’s realtor said the seller wanted 30-40% above the asking price, never mind that there was seepage in the foundation per the disclosures. We placed an offer on another house that is old, most of the interior is very dated, and the disclosures said it needed a new furnace, water heater, electrical, and roof. We offered about 20% over. Winning bid went to someone 40% over.

We’re going to place a bid on another house that was clearly flipped. The seller’s realtor said they wouldn’t consider offers below 50% over the ask price. WHAT IS THE FLIPPING POINT OF AN ASKING PRICE IF YOU WON’T CONSIDER ANYTHING BELOW 50% OVER??? People who are looking at houses priced near your asking price probably can’t afford your insane asking prices. We’ll still put in an offer but I think we’re going to be on the lower end for the offers.

Just frustrated about these stupid mind games. Tell me you want a mountain of money so I know not to waste my time.